I feel like I have been in a "mini" Manic stretch starting Wed. Yesterday was the crash.
All along I thought I could make a difference, have a voice, be the "face" of BPD. Now I realize I can only be the face Of Michael Johnson...who happens to have BPD. I don't know where this is going.
I try to keep my faith up. I really want to also convey, in the depths of my own pain I still feel like I have something to offer. I'm just not sure where to go to do that.
My message today is simply two fold
1) Today is the first day of the rest of your life
2) I will be my brothers keeper
To me, #2 means I will walk with anyone on their own journey. I get that from some of the most unlikely people. There are forums, blogs, etc....that are an avenue. #2 also means no more stigma, no more hiding and an sincere desire to explore treatments, some that may be a little different.
Any way one of my absolute favorite songs is my song today. It offers hope and addresses both #1 and #2
After feeling so lonely I am amazed by a few friends from HS have reached out to me, offered to walk this journey with me and it reminds me that there was a time in my life where I felt a lot of joy and love